Monday, March 10, 2008

For the Love of a Dog

Dear Sasha,

Today you departed this world and left behind a big hole in my heart.

I found you at the Humane Society when I was 13 years old. You were 6 months old and the perfect present for a brand new teenager. You were just the kind of ugly mutt that I had always loved and that the rest of the world neglected. You were covered in fleas and ticks, but you cleaned up really well when it came time for us to take you home. On the drive to your new home, you were so scared you were drooling everywhere. I felt so sorry for you.

You quickly adapted to your new home though. Soon you had earned the affections of everyone around you. We gave you so many nicknames, like "Firf" and "Firfacles" and "Maggot." (Okay, so I never once called you "Maggot.") Your life was a simple one, filled with days of sun, food, green grass, and lots of rubs. You were always so sweet. And damn, you ate a whole hell of a lot! But you won our hearts and remained there. Even after I left home, you stayed behind, but you were always so happy to see me when I came back. Truly, it was like no time had passed.

I had known for awhile that you were not going to be around much longer. You gave us quite a scare less than a year ago when you got really sick. I thought for sure you were going to leave us that day, but you got better and hung in there. It was only right that you stayed around long enough for me to get married - after all, we grew up together.

Tonight, when my mom called, I knew by her voice that something was terribly wrong. She didn't want to tell me right then because I was just getting out of class, but because I pressed her, she told me that she had to put you to sleep earlier in the day. You were in so much pain and were so old. You were incontinent and couldn't even hold yourself up anymore. I kept it all in pretty well until she told me that she was having you cremated and wanted me to have your ashes. I pretty much lost it then, right in the middle of the campus parking lot.

I really don't want your ashes. I just want you to be alive and healthy. But I know you were in so much pain, and I never wanted you to suffer. So I have decided that I am happy to take your ashes if it means that you are running around crazily in some amazing doggy heaven.

And so, my Firf, I guess this is goodbye. We watched each other grow up, and frankly, I don't know how I will ever get over losing you. I love you so very much and will miss you always. Even though I was very much expecting this, I still wasn't prepared to lose my favorite canine forever.

Safe travels, fuzzy one.


the girl who loves you

PS - If you happen to see Melinda and Chris's dog Roxy in the great beyond, please befriend her. She too passed on today and will need a good friend. Here is her picture, so you know who to look for.

PPS - Kim reminded me that both you and Roxy will have a guide in the great beyond. Her name is Molly, and she needs some good friends too.

RIP, Sasha, Roxy, and Molly


Jessica said...

The only hard thing about loving a dog is that their lives are just too short.

What a beautiful friend you had.

Kim said...


Fuck today to hell.

RIP, Sasha and Roxy. Give a shout to my girl Molly if you can. :)

WeezerMonkey said...

Good God, I didn't even know any of these doggies, and I am teary-eyed. :(

Much love.

Discombobulated said...

I have officially lost it.
I was sad about Roxy, now I am devasted at the loss both of you have experienced :(
I am so sorry to hear this.

RIP, all of our four legged family members.

A Real Librarian said...

{wiping tears} I am so sorry to hear this. Rest in peace, sweet puppies.

Mme. Meow said...

Losing a beloved pet is so rough. I'm so sorry.

alejna said...

I'm so sorry. Thank you for sharing your beautiful letter to your sweet puppy. He sounds like he was a wonderful dog, and a great friend.

inflammatory writ said...

:( I'm sorry for your losses. Losing pets is just as hard as losing people. I had a huge lump in my throat reading this.

MissSparkle76 said...

I too have joined the crying bandwagon!!

So sorry for your loss and melindas.

Today offical sucks!!

RIP Sasha and Roxy.

sherthebear said...

:(. It is a sad week for pets. RIP Sasha, Roxy, and Molly

dapotato said...

my heart goes out to you and all the other dogs' humans.

EW said...

I'll bet they're all running around like crazy dogs on the Rainbow Bridge. So sorry for your loss. I couldn't even read the whole tribute you wrote. Makes me too sad :(

amber said...

[grabbing a tissue]

i'm so sad to read all of this. :(

Anonymous said...


Brenda said...

Oh the tears won't stop and I'm staring at my computer screen at work. I am so sorry for the loss of your beloved Sasha. I can see them now, Sasha, Molly and Roxy galloping through the lovely fields of gold...talking about their humans in doggy heaven. [sniffle]

Librarian Girl said...

That made me really teary.

I can just see what I sweet doggy friend you had.

Hugs to you.

Nanette said...

I'm super mega late, but I'm still super mega sad for you and your loss. :(

Christine Farah Photography said...

Oh I cannot stop crying! I am so sorry Leslie for your loss and for Melinda's I know how much a pet can become a big chunk of your heart. My thoughts are with you both. :(